it's been a while. sorry.

things are changing quite fast. much is going on. i won't bore you with the details but the biggest thing is my move out of my beloved big red. i'll be moving into a house with a few close friends, benjamin, pony, and Jmac. i really don't want to leave big red but i just can't afford it on my own. it is the end on an era. -and the beginning of a new one.

i turn 36 tomorrow. wow. that's all i can say about that.

i just wrote a bunch of stuff about my current state of affairs regarding my life. -as you can see i deleted it.

i'll try again later when there's some continuity to it.


here's my new mullet. i've been rocking it since my white trash dance party on NYE. it has powers. great powers. it is my cape.



for motr photos of the white trash dance party, go myspace.com/toad_ali

and here's my bunny. i've wanted a velveteen rabbit tattoo for a long time.


status update

i'm doing well. i'm getting my house in order. trying to get all my things where they should be. -still waiting on some of those things from julie. we try to talk when we see each other out. we're doing well with that. alcohol always seems to help.

i've been trying to ask girls out again. i don't even want close to another girlfriend but i do need to talk to people now and talking with a pretty girl is always good for the ego. so, of all the girls i've asked out (which really isn't many at all) one has agreed to meet up with me (the rest have boyfriends) however it'll be in another week because of her tour schedule apparently. i know better than to ask out bar tenders and servers but i don't even care right now. the fear of rejection hasn't even been an issue as of late. perhaps this is a beginning to a new confidence. i'd like to change. i'd like to open up a bit more. i'd like to emote -at all. we'll see how my new social experiment goes. toad 2.0

i'm still not real comfortable siting at my place all the time so if you want to get out for a drink, give me a hollah. 615.306.three.three.five.one.

or IM me at AIM - troh23


today she's due in from chic ago to pack her stuff and move out. i feel like she's trying to avoid me but i have to talk to her. we have a lot of things to work out domestically and i especially have a lot of things i need to resolve. i need her to talk to me. i need to see her face. h'm not trying to fix anything. i need my kind of closer so we can make this as easy as possible. otherwise i will be angry and resentful and a dick and she will only counter my anger with more anger. i don't want to make this fucked up. it can be easy. i just need to talk.

of course with these recent developments I've acquired more financial responsibility. -like my rent just doubled. I want to stay where i am. i love being at big red. i will find nothing like it for that price. on paper i can swing it. i just have to keep myself on a really short leash. however, right now isn't the time i really want to be spending a lot of time at home. i thought about building a couple rooms and get a room mate, but that would change what it is and it wouldn't be why i wanted to stay. i like the wide open space of living in a studio.

i may try to sell my truck so i won't have a payment to worry about. it's a good idea however julie's been driving my truck for a year (still is) and has wreck, broke and scratched a few things. all of which i need her to fix so i can get a better resale value for it. she say's she'll fix them but i honestly don't know. i just bought the truck last year and drove in about 3 months before she needed a vehicle and i let her use it. i haven't seen it since.

i still love her and h'm still attracted to her and that's going to take a while to wear off. we have a lot of the same friends and things are going to be weird. -but i don't want to make them difficult. i am respectful.

h'm anxious it get this over with. i need to see my place with her stuff gone. i need to get a look at what i have. i need for her to repay me so i don't feel like she owes me anything. i need to clean up and move things around. i need to fill open spaces with something else to take up some room. i need to throw a lot of things away. i need to dig up things that i put away and lost. i need to shed a little skin.


I've been feeling like I'm just off the right frequency. not quite dialed in. can't hear the musicr because of all the static and chatter. Jules just left last week for another month in chicago. thaqt may have a little to do with it but generally i like my me time. I think it's just that i feel out of sync with my friends because i really haven't seen any of them in a while. -or actually had real time with them. with jules gone, i've become a house zombie. not much going on with me but sitting in a lazy-boy watching sci-fi and CSI.

anyway, enough of that.

if you know the aardvarks, then be sure to come out and celebrate with them at Baily's on broadway. It's a launch party for Thr3eSlackers.com, Brodie, Auggie and Rob's new t-shirt company they started. Silly and rude-type t-shirts that are fun for everyone. There should be food and drink and live music. The upstairs is reserved for us all.

but yeah, come to the party. it'll be fun.

Cough-cough wheeeze die....

today was the first day i rode my bicycle to work. it was noly 6 miles but it nearly killed me. i had to stop twice and give myself CPR. i'm just now catching my breath.

let's see if i can do this for the rest of the month.


My bitch with Ticket master.

I bought a couple tickets for a Bad Religion show in Chicago at the House of blues for Julie and her step-brother, Tim. I bought the tickets because I was the one who had computerized money (credit card/debit card). I am not going to be at the show as i will be 500 miles away back in Nashville.

The first thing you notice is the ridiculous charges that they add-on to the purchase of your ticket...

ticket price......................................23.00 x2
Building facility charge........................2.00 x2
"convenience" charge.........................8.55 x2
additional taxes................................0.70
order processing fee..........................4.60
ticketFast (print the ticket out yourself)....2.50

for a total of ...................................74.90


now here's the deal, i originally clicked the will call option as we're less than 10 days away from the show and ticket master wont mail them to you after that (for free. they will charge a lot to have them expedited by carrier). will call was our best and cheapest option. HOWEVER, after purchasing the tickets i noticed a disclaimer: the person who bought the tickets has to be present with the actual credit card and a photo ID to present to will call to receive the tickets. Well, fuck. i was going to be 500 miles back home in Nashville.

so then i called ticketmaster and waited 15 minutes for a CSR. I told them that I cant be at the show and that the tickets were bought as gifts. He said something about a "special will call" but that would still have to be a person with the same last name as mine picking up the tickets. that would not work either as julie does not have the same last name as me. so he then suggested the "print your own ticket" option. i said, "what"? he said, yeah, you can just print them out yourself. I said sure, that's fine. He also said that it would be 2.50 to do that. I said, Whoah! there's no way i'm going to pay anymore for these tickets. he was already charging me 26 bucks over the cost of the tickets as it was! I told him that their policy created the inconvenienced and that I won't pay that. (look at me fighting for my 2.50!). he ended up waiving the TicketFast charge and emailed the tickets to me.

I began to ask him about their policy and that i'ts easier to get on a plane than it is to apparently pick up a ticket at will call. if I purchased a ticket online and printed out a conformation, i should be able to use that conformation page to pick up said tickets. It's the same concept as a boarding pass. show them the info you have and a photo Id to match the data that they have and all is well. but no. Ticket master has to suck! He just said that he was sorry a lot. he even said he would have it "looked into." well, I'm glad he's on it!

but aside form the almost total failure of nobody being able to go to that show if i didn't notice some fine print at the end. I think it should be noted that TicketMaster charges WAY TOO MUCH for what they do. I personally don't want to be a customer of their's anymore. I will do what i can to avoid anything purchased thru ticketmaster. I hope you will do the same.

with the advent of the internet, I'm sure that in time local venues will be able to sell their own tickets more easily and cheaply. we can only wait and encourage them to do so but in the meantime, I'll be going to the venues and buying tickets straight from them.


so i'm writing from an LJ client at work again because LJ is blocked by Websence through my job. I haven't been keeping up on LJ for a few months now. Sorry, I have almost acquired hermit status at Big Red. -no not really. I still go on motorcycle rides with the fellas and I do a little hanging out on occasion but not nearly as much as I did a few years ago.

Julie is leaving to Chicago tonight (if she finishes all her work) to help her brother on a job up there. she'll probably be gone 2 or 3 weeks so i'm be getting a little bord with myself pretty soon. this means that i'll probably be coming out more and you can play with me again! I'd really like to go swimming again. pool or river, whatever as long as it's wet and i'm naked.

burning man is about to start again. and again i've missed my chance. the only reason i haven't been going is because julie hasn't been able to go with. next year will not matter. i'm going with or without her. it might be better with out her. she can't stand the heat. once you had heat stroke a couple times your tolerence for heat gets more sensitive and she's had heat stroke a couple times. she hates the south by the way. it's been triple digits for over three weeks now. holy frekin hell it's hot! i typically ride with a motorcycle jacket on (i like my skin) but the roads are near 125 degrees. and sitting on em at a red light almost kills me so i've been riding without lately. i'm definitely more comfortable but i feel a little naked.

oh, and be sure to read "The Goon" comic if your into comics. it's awesome.